Christian Feminism Weekly With Ashley & Charlie

This week Ashley and I are discussing Egalitarian dating and what that looks like vs complementarian dating! Do you have any dating resources for egalitarians? Let us know in the comment section below!

“The Complementarian theology brought a lot of baggage into our relationship because I was taught how a man should act and how a man should be and what a man is… Then I became an Egalitarian and that’s when I started seeing Nate differently. Instead of looking at him with all of these Complementarian rules and these gender roles and stereotypes in my mind, I started to see him for who God made him to be. And God made him to be sensitive and emotional and he has a great gift of self-control and all of that makes him who he is… Once I was able to let go of that baggage that came from being taught Complementarian theology I was able to embrace him for who he is and our relationship instantly changed. It became so much more full of life, acceptance, and real love.”



2 thoughts on “Christian Feminism Weekly With Ashley & Charlie

  1. This was great! I struggled with the exact same thing you did, Charlie — my husband didn’t fit the mold of a complementarian man. He wasn’t a leader personality; his spiritual gifts were more behind-the-scenes; and he wasn’t well-versed in Christian doctrine. He just loved Jesus and other people without any theological labels. I, on the other hand, fit the stereotype of male spiritual leader perfectly…besides being female. 😉 I caused SO much unnecessary tension in the relationship by nagging him to be the spiritual leader and think about our relationship and his role in a “Biblical” way, all the while suppressing my natural gifts. When I finally rejected the notion that we even needed one spiritual leader/head in our relationship, things went so much more smoothly. We got to be ourselves and love the other for him/herself, and we blessed each other and our relationship with the spiritual gifts we each possessed.

    Also, random side note: I grew up hearing all the time that women loved being pursued and men needed to pursue, and that’s why complementarian relationships worked. And well, sure, I’m not going to say no when my husband initiates a romantic evening! But *I* also enjoyed initiating and pursuing, and he also enjoyed being pursued. Mutuality. It’s a good thing. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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